Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Female for Market Research

I got this mail a few days back.


Greeting from XXXX (XXX solution)

Opening for Market Researcher.

Company Profile: Our clients is one of the largest & India's fastest growing electrical and power distribution equipment company.manufacturing products ranging from Building Circuit Protection, Industrial & Domestic Switchgear, Cables & Wires, Energy Meters, Fans, CFL Lamps, Luminaires for Domestic, Commercial & Industrial application and Modular Switches.Our clients has recorded a turnover of Rs. XXXX crores in the previous financial year and is poised for another quantum growth.

Job Profile:Market Research & Market Development

Required Skills:Initiative & Aggressive Attitude.

Fresh/Exp can apply

Female Candidate with Minimum Graduation is must

CTC:Best in industry

XXXX (contact details of the recruiter)


Female candidate?? If this were the US, the EEOC would have already pounced on this company. Secondly, why on earth am I getting this mail? Because of the 'aggressive attitude' caveat? They must have some filtering system!! But I’m curious, why would they specifically require female candidates for something that looks like a door to door survey / sales job for electrical products? I researched the company and the consulting firm and it does seem legit.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

The Rakhi Sawant Showz

Now before we launch a torrent, why is everyone so curious what 'showz' in the title means? Come on people, Rakhi Sawant Showz... She showz, we see. We see, so she showz. If she doesn't show we won't see, and if we don't see she won't show. She knows we see that's why she showz. We know she showz that's why we see. Ok ok... you get the drift.


Mid way when you're watching this show, you'll find yourself lifting eye brows, letting out a snort and flinch and wince and even question why you are watching this show. You’ll want to change the channel. You’ll then convince yourself to put the remote down and wait for the next string of pearls from her mouth.


You recall the ‘Rendezvous with Simi Gareval’ - India’s most popular talk show. Now if you are the host of the most popular talk show in town, comparisons are bound to follow. Simi Gareval – flawless white, well set hair, flawless makeup. And then we have Rakhi Sawant – gaudy clothes, garishly decorated sets, not so oblivious make up. Simi’s style and grace, her feigning effort to laugh and smile with her guests. Rakhi on the other hand is cleavage showing, all bawdy in language and style. Make no mistake for she doesn’t make any pretensions of sympathising with her guests. While you’ll find Simi saying - ‘Your girlfriend broke up with you, it must have been soooo hard!’, Rakhi will not battle an eyelid as she tells Amir Khan - ‘I didn’t like it when you divorced your first wife.’ Simi will leave you wide-mouthed with her impeccable British accent and diction. You’ll identify with Rakhi as she struggles to pronounce ‘rendezvous’ and ask her guests to comment on her English after not uttering a single English word in her entire conversation. Simi will make a guests feel like a star, bigger than what they may actually be. You will feel overawed by them. You will laugh when Hrithik and Suzanne act like young lovers on her show and get all emotional when Rekha lets down her guard. But with Rakhi, there is no bigger star on the show than herself. She will try, let me tell you. ‘You are a star, Amir Ji – A superstar. I wanted you to come to my show because I want my show to become popular!’ ‘Do you want me to fall to your feet, because in some shows they fall to people’s feet.’

All in all, the first episode wasn’t even half as entertaining as the episode where Rakhi Sawant meets Karan Johar on Koffee with Karan… But trust me, here’s a lady to watch out for. Karan Thapar and Rajdeep Sardesai beware, for here comes the mother-in-law of tough interviewers!

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Revisiting Hot Chocolate

I brought down my old blog a few days back. As I was going through the posts one last time before deleting it, there was this piece that caught my attention. It's one of my favorites and I decided to publish it again. I wrote it about a year and a half back when M was away in Japan and it was so difficult for us to catch up even once a day. Today again, he slogs away at B-School and it still is a Herculean task catching up once a day.


My Hot Chocolate


Eyes closed
Cupped hands
Holding a mug
Every sip
Like the taste of new life
Strings of thought
Whispering secrets
Honest promises
Held close
Unmindful smiles
A lingering feeling
Hazy dreams
Ethereal spaces
An oblivion self

A slight cringe
Loud sneeze
The rude awakening
Abundant work
And a preoccupied mind
The chilly air
A fading illusion
Bleary eyes
Haunting silences
Emerging voices
Quiet eagerness
Long hours of wait
Four thousand miles
Above all – an empty mug

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Still not changed the channel...

After I wrote here about how the media is sensationalizing news and our entertainment quotient, I found two more articles. Here's what 'The Maanga' has to say and through his website I chanced upon Sevanti Ninan's article. To the avid readers of Hindu's Sunday Magazine, Sevanti Ninan is no stranger. Here are some excerpts from her article on how news channels are literally selling crime. This might seem funny, but the irony is that it's true...

  • Times Now tracking her calls from cell phone call records leaked to them. Run numbers and times on the screen of who called Aarushi when, whom she called when.
  • NDTV showing a video of the dead girl doing normal things when she was alive.(No seriously... the clipping included the girl going swimming with her family, in a birthday party, at a school function... etc... all played over and over again!!)
  • Zee News informing us that this is the day when the CBI’s remand over Krishna ended. So? So nothing, just reminding you, that’s the news.
  • Cyrus Broacha being funny on CNN IBN: “The CBI is looking for a khukri. Why look for a khukri when you already have a Talwar?”
  • Aaj Tak showing two presenters going around a flat which they said was exactly similar to the Talwars’ and was in the same complex. They show us the location of Arushi’s room and her parent’s room and Hemraj’s room. There is a model lying on the bed in Aarushi’s “room” placed exactly like it reportedly was, and there are blood stains on the door. (They kept saying this was reconstructed from CBI information) Then build a case for the fact that there was no way her parents could not have heard noises, despite the AC. Ergo, the Talwars’ testimony is fishy.
  • India TV’s amateur sleuthing: Krishna is lying when he says he flushed the khukri down the toilet. But look, we’ll show you how 10 minutes of repeated flushing does not flush a khukri! So a potty was there for 10 minutes on the TV screen, sometimes in the foreground, sometimes in the background, flushing away.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Mundane monday?

I wish for a mundane day. Like a day that just cruises by. No surprises. No procrastination. Just like that. A day that requires no planning, no juggling, no confusions, no crisis management. A day where my mobile phone is not disconnected because I exceeded the credit limit. Clients don’t scream because mails are bouncing. Hubby doesn’t throw last minute lunch plans. The milk doesn’t boil over. Maid doesn’t demand for more money. Boss hasn’t changed her mind since our discussion last night. Mom won’t provide advice. Network doesn’t act up. I don’t forget things on my shopping list. The courier doesn’t go missing. Dad stops asking about Form 16. The color doesn’t run off my new T-Shirt. I don’t have to curse on the road. Client doesn’t demand a report right away. My checking account doesn’t fall short of cash. The beautician doesn’t nip my brow. I’m not asked to travel within a day’s notice. My neighbor doesn’t annoy me. My i-pod won’t hang. The onions don’t get burned up. My data won’t go pufffffhhhhh. Tele-marketers won’t call. I don’t find a lizard in the bathroom. The fat won’t pile on. The AC won’t breakdown. I don’t have to fight with auto-drivers. I don’t forget birthdays.

You get me? Just a normal day…

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The button on your remote

Today, we've reached a different realm in reality shows and entertainment. We started off with the 'Saas bhi kabhi bahu thee' types. We were hooked to it. We wanted to know everything despite the fact that it was so far far fetched from reality. Despite the fact that people never got old, never died, and even if they died they magically returned from the dead. Then came the 'Big brother' types - the reality shows... Oh! We wouldn't budge from the couch, even during commercial breaks. It was all real now. All the heartbreaks, all emotions, the fights, the tears, the fun... all real. We watched them, we patronized them, we glorified them, we laughed for them, we cried for them and of course we voted for them.

What next? Where does the search for new entertainment take us? What are creative minds in the industry brewing now? Reality like you've never seen it before. Reality at its realistic best! 'The Noida Murder Case'... It's been a month since the incident, there hasn't been a single day that either Times Now or Headlines Today or Aaj Tak hasn't covered this news story. They've covered it, alright! Now we have collages, the testimonies, the goof ups... all live and unfolding right in front of us. It makes me wonder about the motivation of these news channels. Tracking the case all the way to justice, one would like to presume. We all are God's children... In the eyes of the media - some more than the others, I guess. Check it out here - Rediff has a page dedicated just to track Arushi's murder. The page lists out all the news that has been reported in a chronological manner. And there is more - there's a wiki dedicated to her and Balaji Telefilms is contemplating making 'Arushi bhi kabhi zindha thi'.

Now, where does this take us as viewers? How far will the media and the industry go to keep feeding our curiosity and entertainment needs? Are we willing to go where the media wants to take us? Are we willing to gobble up all that the media feeds us? Or are we going to pull the plug? Remember... the remote is in your hands, you may very well change the channel now!

Monday, June 16, 2008

'Doc'ing and 'Zoho'ing

This morning I spent a considerable amount of time in solving a seemingly simple problem. We had a meeting with a client to whom we had to make a presentation. The logistics was challenging. The client was located in another continent, my colleague in another city and me here. I set thinking about an online presentation tool. Google Docs was the first obvious choice.

I've been using Google Docs for quite sometime now. Initially it was mostly for personal work - sharing travel plans, check lists and some other random stuff. These days I use it a lot more at work. We are a three member team working on this other assignment and we are located at different locations and worse still, we travel a lot. What do you do? How do you collaborate? How do you exchange notes? How do you keep track of email? Switching to Google Docs provided an instant solution. I had no doubts that this would be simple till I realized that Google Presentations did not have the option of making remote presentation without having to login with your Google account. Now, expecting a client to have a gmail ID and use it to login and access a simple presentation seemed a bit too much to ask for.

My second choice - Zoho. I’ve been dabbling with Zoho Apps on and off. I found their spread of applications interesting, I like their usability and moreover Sridhar’s blog is one of the most interesting ones in Silicon Valley. That was the “on” part; the “off” part comes from the fact that though I can use a Google account to sign in, when I try going offline (yes! the darn airports and the wait times) and logging in to synchronize, it requires a Zoho account only. By now I have too many IDs and passwords; I decided I couldn’t be bothered with another one.

Zoho Show thankfully had the option of remote presenting without having to login. The entire functionality is really cool; you must try it sometime. Apart from the few glitches (which gobbled up a couple of hours this morning) where Zoho Show wouldn’t properly import the formatting from my actual presentation, everything went off smooth and glitch-free (crossing fingers and toes - I have another one coming up next week).

Zoho and Google Docs launched in 2005-2006. Since then they have been pitched as Microsoft Office’s competitors and seen as applications set to replace the office suite. There are even articles that speculate how office will see its end soon and how people and businesses will start using online apps for all practical purposes. After today’s experience with Zoho and my past experience with Google Docs, I don’t see this happening very soon. Unless one of these companies does something drastic to improve the product performance, I don’t see this happening at least for another decade.

Apart from the fact that the applications require a decent internet connection, the functionality of both, in my opinion is still shaky. While use of the word processor generally goes off glitch free, the problem starts while using the spreadsheets and the presentations. A little too many rows and the application starts losing control - shaky screens, brief hanging, slow responses. My experience with Zoho-Show was far worse. My presentation was already there in powerpoint and all Zoho had to do was import it. Spacing and bullets went awry, the paste function stopped working, the way the slides normally looked on the slides was different from the way it looked on the slide show. I spent quite a few hours fixing it, something that would have normally taken me just a few minutes on powerpoint.

All said and done, the fact that they exist makes life a lot easier. But replacing Office, they have a long long way to go!